People don't truly love their spouses. They love themselves, and their spouses are there to fulfill their needs and their dreams. That's why one tries to change the other as soon as they are a couple.
Men now, out of insecurity, don't allow their wives to do the same things they thought were hot before and when they met each other. She suddenly cannot wear the same kind of clothes, she shouldn't be focused on her career, she should trade gyms for home workouts.
Women try to kill men's hobbies because she wants to mold their husbands per their concept of a perfect man. Little by little, things that once they were "attracted to", or she found cute, or manly, will be removed from him: the motorcycle, the cigars, the time with his friends, the band he used to play in. Now he's a married man, he doesn't need that anymore. His attention should be all to his family.
They don't love each other. They love themselves and they know there is something missing inside themselves, and the other person is just a piece of the puzzle. Now, with this person they are molding, THEY (he or she) are complete. "You complete me". "But only after I teak you."
If you truly love her, or him, you will accept that being in a band doesn't take time with him away from you, it makes the other person enjoy more the time that you are together; you will accept that wearing provocative outfits, it's not to attract other males, but to keep you interested. And if you really, honestly, love the other person, you will let them go to be the best version of who they are even if it's not with you. Because, if you don't, you're just being possessive.